Driving Mrs. Birdie...
Oct. 17th, 2005 09:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
redneckgaijin(while driving my grandmother, Birdie Mae Knight Overstreet Bearss, on a shopping run this afternoon; my Mamaw is an inveterate talker and backseat driver who usually drives me NUTS)
(car pulls up behind another car, turning left at an intersection with neither left turn lane nor controlled left turn light)
BIRDIE: Oh shit.
ME: What? What?
BIRDIE: The car in front of us, he'll never turn. You got in a bad place.
ME: Well, don't take it out on him. In a block and a half I'll have to make a turn just like it [to pull into the Jack-in-the-Box drive through], so don't say, "Oh shit."
BIRDIE: I didn't say that. I never use that word. I said, "Oh shoot."
ME: You did not!
BIRDIE: I did! I never say, "Oh shit."
ME: Is that so? Are you going to tell me next that when we have guests over, you tell them to be careful not to step in the cat shoot? I DARE you to tell me that with a straight face.
(At this point my grandmother is helpless with laughter. I have scored my point; it is a good day.)
(Oh, house insurance adjuster came by today; losing two fridges and three deep freezes of food, showing significant leaks in the roof and signs that the roof will have to be re-peaked at the least, roof of the old house partiallly gone, fence more or less destroyed in several places, lost one deep freeze, had to replace hot water heater and refloor chamber, and living expenses during hurricane blackout... all of that resulted in a check of slightly less than $5000, mostly due to a $500 cap on food losses and a $400 cap on "outlying structures." Mamaw is going to go insurance shopping, despite the fact that Foremost is the ONLY company which will cover the 1970s era trailer the house is built outwards from...)
(car pulls up behind another car, turning left at an intersection with neither left turn lane nor controlled left turn light)
BIRDIE: Oh shit.
ME: What? What?
BIRDIE: The car in front of us, he'll never turn. You got in a bad place.
ME: Well, don't take it out on him. In a block and a half I'll have to make a turn just like it [to pull into the Jack-in-the-Box drive through], so don't say, "Oh shit."
BIRDIE: I didn't say that. I never use that word. I said, "Oh shoot."
ME: You did not!
BIRDIE: I did! I never say, "Oh shit."
ME: Is that so? Are you going to tell me next that when we have guests over, you tell them to be careful not to step in the cat shoot? I DARE you to tell me that with a straight face.
(At this point my grandmother is helpless with laughter. I have scored my point; it is a good day.)
(Oh, house insurance adjuster came by today; losing two fridges and three deep freezes of food, showing significant leaks in the roof and signs that the roof will have to be re-peaked at the least, roof of the old house partiallly gone, fence more or less destroyed in several places, lost one deep freeze, had to replace hot water heater and refloor chamber, and living expenses during hurricane blackout... all of that resulted in a check of slightly less than $5000, mostly due to a $500 cap on food losses and a $400 cap on "outlying structures." Mamaw is going to go insurance shopping, despite the fact that Foremost is the ONLY company which will cover the 1970s era trailer the house is built outwards from...)
