FILK: "Doctor Number Five"

[redneckgaijin]

(tune- what there is of it- "Mambo Number Five." I had to listen to the whole thing repeatedly to get the meter close enough to work. Your pity is welcome.)

2, 4, 6 8 10
Everybody in the Tardis, doin' it again
There's been eleven Doctors maybe more, the boys say
Tom Baker was the only one but I really don't know
Tennant's acting is pretty deep
But the girls go squee for Jon Pertwee
I like Eccleston, Troughton, Hartnell and McCoy
But you mustn't forget about my number one boy
In 1982, give or take a few, y'know
He was the man on Britain's favorite show
Away with his companions- who were they all?
Please lemme hear a roll call

A little bit of Adric, he's gonna die
And Nyssa of Traken, last survi-vor
An Aussie named Tegan, works the airline
A little twerp named Turlough to snarl and whine
A little Brigadier off teaching school
A bot named Kamelion, the Master's tool
A little bit of Peri, American (yeah right)
A little Doctor Who makes me a fan

Doctor number five!

Casting call, when Tom Baker takes his fall
Replace him with Tristan from All Things Great and Small
A Panama hat and a cricket bat
And a piece of celery- what's up with that?
Add some baddies and you're doing it right
What monsters is the Doctor gonna battle tonight?

A little bit of Mara, a snaky thing
A little Black Guardian pulling strings
A little time travel with the Cybermen
A couple Sea Devils and Silurians
A little Omega to annhiliate
Davros and his Daleks exterminate
Bringing back the Master again and again,
A little Doctor Who makes me a fan

Tardis! The Tardis!
Doctor number five!

Regeneration in the Zero Room
A little Castrovalva going boom
A little bit of London set on fire
A freighter starts the dinosaur funeral pyre
A leper colony named Terminus
A little Five Doctors (more or less)
Spetrox toxaemia brings the end
A little Doctor Who makes me a fan

I- do- all- to-
Catch up with episodes of classic Doctor Who
But when Peter Davidson stepped aside
In came Colin Baker- ay yi yi

Doctor number SIX
YECH!